December 14, 2007

Shortcut to Wisdom

Are you seeking enlightenment but are just too busy for all that studying and meditating? Are you hungry for wisdom but too impatient for the better understanding of the workings of the universe that comes with life experience?

Relax. There's no need to remain an ignoramus simply because you can't spend four years in a Tibetan monastery.

Now you can absorb the wisdom of the masters in tiny, digestible bits without the bother of prolonged study or all that tedious deep breathing. Let me share with you, my fellow seekers, a few shortcuts I've found on the Road to Enlightenment.

A couple of years ago when I was in the middle of a "What's It All About, Alfie?" phase, I picked up a book called "50 Self-Help Classics" by Tom Butler-Bowdon. It's a summary-a la CliffsNotes-of the works of people from Thomas Moore to Abraham Maslow to Dale Carnegie to Dr. Phil.

Here's a sample: The chapter on Henry David Thoreau, who wrote the classic "Walden" about what he learned during two years in a log cabin in the woods, is summarized like this: "Make sure you have time in your life just to think." And how do you find more time to think? By not reading "Walden," I guess.

Don't have time to read "The Power of Positive Thinking" by Norman Vincent Peale" or even the 6-page summary of it in "50 Self-Help Classics"? Here's the "in a nutshell" version offered by author Butler-Bowdon: "You can achieve anything if you have faith."

If your life is crazy busy right now, perhaps even the boiled-down sagacity of this 300-page book is too much of a commitment for you. Fear not. Now the good folks at Wisdomcd.com have put together CDs of bite-sized insight, because, according to their press release, they recognize that "Not only do we want it now, we also want to get to the meat of a subject without laboring through pages of written fluff."

As a purveyor of written fluff, I'm slightly disturbed by the notion that complex ideas can be boiled down to sound bites, but I'm keeping an open mind, if only because "50 Self-Help Classics" taught me that "Cultivation of an optimistic mindset significantly increases your chances of health, wealth, and happiness."

The Wisdom CD includes mini-courses such as "Journey to Light-Heartedness" by the aptly named Kari Joys; "Oneness" by a woman with one name (Rasha); and "The Habit of Attraction" by Robert Evans, who promises to make you a Master Manifester.

I want this CD, if only to see what methods they use to get people to move from this survey course to the full courses (worth $570, according to the web site).

Santa, please bring me the Wisdom CD Vol. 1 ("The Greatest Personal Development CD ROM Ever Created!") for Christmas. It will only set you back $24.95.

If Santa doesn't bring you this wisdom-on-a-disc surprise, I've found the ultimate in cheap, easy enlightenment: a package of paper napkins. Bounty now offers colorful napkins with affirmations to cheer you while you wipe bagel crumbs off your chin. "Peace is a journey, not a destination," preaches this paper product. Not a morning person? The napkin reminds us to "Sing a song of rainbows." Having body image issues? Remember to "Be beautiful; be yourself."

Busy people, you don't need to climb to the mountaintop to achieve enlightenment. You can read a quick summary of the wisdom of the ages, pop in a CD to watch a flash movie, or simply read the napkin at the breakfast table to learn to "Worry little, dream big."